Garage/Greenhouse
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Julie's Views

While the website editor’s explanation of events is accurate in great part, his clinical recitation omitted several nuances important to the reader’s ability to place this incident in its proper context.  It is true that I seem to be challenged in the area of floor-plan-to-actual-dimensions visualization, and it is also true that on more than one occasion Mark urged that we add 4, 6 or 8 more feet to the addition.  This was usually in the same breath that he was urging that we expand the Really Big Pots and Pans Storeroom/Food Prep Center (hereinafter known as “the pantry”) from its current dimensions of 8' X 12' to something much bigger, and expand the kitchen to resemble the Iron Chef stadium.  Timing is important here, too – these conversations were happening at the same time Mark had joined his battle with Wolf over the need to have at least 8 to 10 burners on his Mammoth Hunk of Steel and Pyrotechnics (hereinafter known as “the range”).*   Can you blame me, dear readers, for putting his suggestions to make the addition “bigger, it should be bigger” down as the ravings of a man driven mad after years of captivity in our tiny bungalow?  If he had invited me to join him in the dispassionate taping of the space that he describes, I might well have achieved his karmic sense of space.  It was the drooling and the twitching when he growled “let’s supersize it” that blinded me to the truth behind the mania, which I will forever regret, because now I am probably the only person on earth who has traded a hot tub for a crawlspace.  And, will have repeated to me for the rest of my natural life, as well as engraved on his tombstone, the following words:  “I could have had 6 more feet of basement.” 

* See upcoming article "At War With Wolf", Journal on Military Strategy and Home Renovation, Vol. II, 2003, Mark Wayda, Ph.D

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